Everything will change, but love remains the same.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006 9:24 PM

There are only say, 2 people online now? Looks like everyone is either banned, mugging or asleep. I now it is a little unrealistic to be asleep at 9.30 but yea, soem parents are just paranoid. I am annoyed. Someone thinks I am soo stressed up and claims I am mugging now I am sooo not. She was like: "bu yao zai du le" My hairs were standing on ends.

But oh wells, I broke my promise to myself again. I promised never to express hatred, displeasure towards anyone, no matter how effing that person is. Okay, from now on, i am not going to break that promise again. I owe this person alot, not that I wanted to but yea, i do! So, what else can I do but put up with her? shes not my mother btw. I am going to control my displeasure, show her an angelic smile, give her her favorite 275. But no, i am doing all these for myself, not her.

It is surprising how fast it is, just yesterday I was waiting for tomorrow to come faster. whooooosh, it is here already. I need to repeat that fact to myself again and again, I need to get it into my head. No more fooling around, focus and concentrate. I know the PSLE isn't all that important, I know it is one of the most minor of our major exams. But I just want to do well. I don want to disapoint everyone, I want to LIVE up to expectations. I want to let him know that I am okay and not let him worry.

However, most importantly, I want to prove to myself that I am of some value. I want to make all my efforts worthwhile. I want to let him rest in peace. It is funny how such an unimportant exam can cause such lofty aspirations. I am not nervous, not scared, not tense. Really. I know it is partially because of him, him and my guardian angel. The one who has always been there for me. I know you will still be by my side during these few days, it is now my turn to show you that all you have done for me is worthwhile.

I know this isn't the time for all my crap. I now everyone needs peace and quiet. I know this is the critical moment deciding whether we will be crying or cheering on our graduation day. I know everyone thinks it is important, Yes it is. But thinking it is important does not mean that we have to be nervous, does it? I feel more and more realaxed as the day gets nearer and nearer. And on the night of the day before the real thing, I do not find myself getting tense. In fact, I am smiling, beaming, gleefully and hopefully!

On this day, the day before the big exam, I have an urge to make a dedication. To him, to my guardian angel, to my frends, to everyone and to myself. I dono if I can remember the exact lyrics, but I am going to try. The second part is my own lyrics

You give me wings when I'm falling
You lift me up when I'm down
You lift me high
Touching the sky
And you make me fly~~~

You give me love, when I need it
You help me soar, to the skies
You stand by me
Braving the storms
And you take me high~~~

jia you. let go and rise ABOVE THE ORDINARY! ((: